The Meme That Ruined me

I really didn’t want to address this in this book, but I have to. If you do any research on me, you’ll see that this is one of the biggest criticisms people have. If someone from the hate mob actually reads this book, they’ll be upset that I didn’t address it. I wasn’t going to write about this because it’s literally the silliest part about my entire canceling, and to give it attention kind of makes me cringe. To even call it a criticism makes me face palm. This criticism is that I’ve said, “I’m not a drama channel”, and the hate mob uses it as their primary piece of evidence that I’m a liar, which is absolutely ridiculous. This is so ridiculous that my editor thinks it’s probably the funniest part of this whole scenario.

You learned earlier about why I started using YouTube topics to teach people about mental health. YouTube drama is absolutely ridiculous, but there’s a lot we can learn from it for our own lives. Many people who started to like my channel saw exactly what I was doing and why it was different than drama channels. Drama channels would just report the story and chime in with their opinion. I would take a different angle to try and make the viewer reflect on their own life.

Every now and then, I’d get a comment saying, “You’re not a mental health channel! You’re just a drama channel!” I found this funny. I find it funny because nobody would call Philip DeFranco a “drama channel” because he covered the James Charles situation. Nobody would call CNN the same as TMZ just because they cover some trendy, celebrity-related news now and then.

I get flooded with questions, and I wish I could answer them all, but it was impossible with the way my channel was growing. Not only would I get questions, but people would request that I do videos on different topics. So, as a way to limit the amount of questions I received and would answer, I made this a Patreon perk. Although I have multiple levels of Patreon, you get access to the monthly Q & A for the lowest tier of $1 a month. In return for supporting the channel for a measly $1 a month, you can ask me a question that I’ll for sure answer.

One of the questions I got one month was if I plan on covering more mental health topics instead of drama. I decided to continue the meme by making a joke about it in my video that I made answering the questions. At the beginning of the video, I acted extremely serious and said, “I…am not…a drama channel!” When I sent the video to my editor, Zach, I told him that for the intro, I wanted him to like really spruce it up. I told him to slowly zoom in on my face and maybe give me a demonic voice too.

He did this like a pro. Not only did it zoom in and change my voice to this kind of demon-sounding voice, but he also gave it this red tint, so I looked extra evil. It was hilarious and awesome.

Check it out! He even made a great thumbnail to go with it!


In the video, when I got to that question, I answered it seriously. I gave the analogy I always give about how it’s like feeding a dog medicine. I wrap the exterior of the video with something tasty the viewer wants, but then they get something helpful on the inside. I gave a list of my videos that appeared to be drama videos on the outside, but I explained the mental health lessons that were in each video.

I thought that was it. Just kind of a funny thing that I did that nobody would remember. In fact, the video barely has any views, so you’d think it wasn’t a big deal, but oh my god, here’s where we get ridiculous.

As the hate mob started coming after me, someone took that clip and used it in a video. Then, every hate video about me used the clip from the intro. Yeah, the one where I purposely told Zach to make it like that. This clip is used in almost every single hate video about me, and it’s so silly to watch it happen. A clip I made joking about myself is now being used in the context of, “See! THIS MAN IS A LIAR!”

Listen, I get why this became such a big deal. Well, at least I think I do. Remember how I said I was friendly with a bunch of drama channels? I assume they took this as me saying I was better than them. That’s just a theory, but I don’t know if it’s correct. If that’s the case, I wish I would have just had a conversation with them about it.

Like most people, I’m multidimensional. Although my life is all about helping those who are struggling with their mental health, I’m not better than anyone. Like you and everyone else, I enjoy watching trashy reality TV as much as the next person. I enjoy watching drama channels, and I’m not afraid to admit it. When we watch drama, it can make us feel a little bit better about our own lives, and I think that’s why drama channels are so successful.

The problem is that with my DM that got leaked and the idea that I didn’t want to be associated with drama channels spread like wild fire, they were able to create more of a narrative that makes me look bad.

At the end of the day, yes, I’m a drama channel. I’m a drama channel. I’m a commentary channel. I’m a news channel. I’m a mental health channel. I’m a channel that reviews TV shows and movies. I’m all of these things. It’s the same that I’m a YouTuber, a father, an addict in recovery, a boyfriend, a friend, a son and many other things.

I’ve debated about 100x making a video just saying, “I’m a drama channel”, but I learned that this probably wouldn’t make anything better. It might just make it worse. I just really hope the drama channels know that I respect what they do, and they have a place on YouTube just like everyone else. People love escapism and keeping up on celebrity gossip. Something many people don’t know about me is that I used to be obsessed with Perez Hilton and TMZ just watching all of the celeb gossip going on, and maybe that’s why it’s been so attractive to me to cover the topics while also trying to teach the audience a lesson.

But, if any drama channels are reading this, I’d like to personally apologize if I came off as “better than”. I need you and the community needs you. Not only do you entertain with your sassiness, but you keep people accountable and help people escape the drama of their own lives.

Chris Boutte